• What's a cow's favorite holiday?
  • Moo Year’s Eve
• What resolution did a spider make for the New Year?
  • To spend less time on the web
• What does a ghost say on January 1?
  • Happy Boo-year!
• What happened to the person who stole a calendar on New Year’s Eve?
  • They got 12 months
• What do snowmen do on New Year’s Eve?
  • They chill out
• What do you call someone who says they know all the words to “Auld Lang Syne“?
  • A liar
• What New Year’s resolution should a basketball player never make?
  • To travel more 
• Knock, Knock.
  Who’s there?
  Radio.
  Radio who?
  • Radio not, it’s a new year.